BFF or Friendzoned?


Pic Source: Google

I still don’t get how I survive the night with this incessant heat. It is beginning to drive me crazy. It has now become a routine to wake up every 1:00am and 3:00am to shower again so I can sleep in peace for the rest of the night. And then, mosquitoes are not helping the already infuriating situation. It seems like all the mosquitoes have just been unleashed on earth to increase their blood bank at whatever cost. Can someone proffer a solution to this nemesis already??? It is beginning to affect the life of a common man. Can I get someone to second that? Biko, don’t let me digress from what I want to rant about.
Yes I am going to rant and please I need your opinion on this. Don’t just read and walk away. Let me know how you feel either in the comment section or even on my social media page.
I can’t remember how this conversation began between me and a friend but the next thing we were talking about is friendship between opposite sex.
We started an argument on how it is impossible for opposite sex to forever remain friends without dating and if the dating won’t work, the friendship dies.
Trust your girl na, I immediately jumped to the defence of the ladies’. I said guys are always the one initiating the relationship. They will always want more, ask for more and even ready to shove the more down your throat and if you cannot do it, they move on as if you guys were never friends.
And then my friend asked me a question, ‘Debs, how many guys have you asked out on a date?’
I felt insulted and started shouting. ‘Ask a guy on a date ke, what do you mean, guys are meant to initiate such conversation na. Even if I like you, I will never directly tell you at the beginning. It is your job to go through that stress.’
If I had known, I would have just shut up. He got his point. He calmly explained to me that if two people are close, there will definitely be some level of intimacy between them at some point. Either on the lady’s part, the guys’ or even both simultaneously. But because of the general belief in this part of the world where we come from and as I have clearly demonstrated, ladies will never take the first step. And then if a guy decides to break the jinx, whatever happens afterwards, the guy gets the blame.
Well, I won’t just accept defeat na. I went further to say why would he bring it up in the first place. As a guy, I believe you should know when a lady is into you. Don’t even try to enlighten me on how pretentious ladies could be. If a girl really really like you, you will really really be convinced she does without being told. You guys are best friends, your friendship should be priority. I am of the opinion that if you guys are actually best of friends, at a point she might have indirectly let you know she cares about you more than just being friends. Until you get that code, please don’t shoot.
Females are very sensitive creatures. They get easily attached and detached to things and people alike. It is not in their nature to love people by halves, so it is either they are into you or not. The moment you tip their grenade, they explode without caution.
I believe before anything, friendship should be valued. Some people will say they cannot remain in the friend zone forever but how many people will a lady date in her life before she gets married if she continue to date every of her best friend. Do you know some ladies even date out of pity? It will start like ‘And he is my friend o, we could actually have something good. Let me date him so he doesn’t feel I don’t care.’ My brother that is a very dangerous venture. If she starts with you on that note, the day she will leave you, you will wish you guys never started anything.
So the bottom line of all these rant is that you should value friendship more than relationship. If you guys are going to be an item, it is just going to happen. Let’s not try forcing it to happen again. Let a lady’s mind be at rest if you guys are just friends without she beginning to wonder from time to time when you will bring up the question because she knows ‘you’ always do.
Abi what do you guys think?


3 thoughts on “BFF or Friendzoned?

  1. A friend once told me….. ” No matter how long you keep a chicken as a pet, one day you go still chop am”…..

    I have a best female friend and of course never got naughty…. did the thoughts come, YES!!! would i have had my way? YES!!! so why didnt i? well…well…. CHOICE!!!!!

    Bottomline, if e go be, its gonna be based on mutual understanding……

    Am out


Be a contributor, share your thoughts

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s